Quit the hustle
We made it!
We survived another holiday season! I know that there are a lot of die-hard Christmas fans out there, but I'm pretty sure that a lot of you reading right now are not among them. And now we have almost 12 months before we have to deal with the craziness again, which makes me very happy.
I don't know about you, but half the excitement of the fresh start that I associate with January is that it's the month farthest away from Christmas. Phew!
I know that New Year's resolutions have gotten a bad rep for being sabotaging, self-esteem-crushing assholes. But I think that the idea of a fresh new start is incredibly motivating! The trick is to choose goals/resolutions/whatever-you-wanna-call-them that are easy to keep. Case in point? My main goal for 2019 is to relax. That should be an easy one to keep, shouldn't it?
As a matter of fact, it's rather difficult for me, but highly rewarding because of that. You see, my default mode of operation is to make my life unnecessarily difficult. Whenever I have a choice to make, my stupid brain tends to lean towards the more difficult option.Why? Who the hell knows. Conditioning maybe, being German, society, the stubbornly held popular belief that there is "no gain without pain"? I think it's a combination of all of the above. But this year I refuse to give in to the ingrained impulse to take the harder route and consciously go for the easier one. Because it's all about relaxing for me this year, about being gentle and kind to myself, and about taking it easy.
I'm tired of the hustle.
I refuse to believe that you have to hustle in order to have a successful and fulfilling life.
I think that's bullshit.
Here is what I've been slowly unlearning over the course of last year, which was a challenging one for me:
I unlearnt the belief that I was only worthy if I was productive.
That's a lie.
You don't have to do anything to be worthy.
You don't have to achieve anything to have a good day.
You can have a day where the highlight is the cup of coffee you brew in the morning, and still declare that day a success.
I'm not just talking out of my ass here.
I've spent the last 6 months being spectacularly unproductive.
Many days I did little more than go to work and go straight to bed from there.
I've spent entire weekends in bed, only getting up to take my corgi Lily for a walk or when work called me in for an x-ray.
I had to take a break because all of us need a break sometimes. If we ignore our body's need for a rest we will eventually get sick, or burn out, or have a melt-down.
I was so tired. I had put so many expectations on myself for so long, I was exhausted. I needed to stop for a while. So I did. And you know what? The world didn't end. My life didn't stop. I still did things: I made a new friend, started a new job, hung out with friends. But I did what I needed to do: 80% of the time I spent on my own, resting, and only 20% of the time I was social. And the biggest life-changer? I refused to feel guilty about it.
To be honest, I didn't have the energy to feel guilty. I was done. But somewhere deep inside me, something else stirred - the rebellious thought that I didn't want to do the fucking hustle any more. I could still be valuable without it - couldn't I?
Oh yes, baby.
I could. We all can.
The constant call to hustle is an invention of life coaches, fitness trainers, and all the other people who hope to make money by selling us their latest hustle-project.
It's a fad. Don't sacrifice your sanity for a trend.
I do believe that we're all constantly evolving.
I do believe that we all need to move forward in order to grow and become the best version of ourselves.
But I also believe in rest.
In just being.
If you need a rest, take it. Without feeling guilty. Without thinking that you just set yourself back.
You didn't.
(from Mantramagazine)
In fact, by taking the time you need, you may propel yourself forward in unexpected ways.
Who knows what we are capable of with enough rest?
Life is an ebb and flow. I believe that there is a natural flow to it that will take place no matter if you go with it or not. So why fight it?
My main goal for these beautiful, as-yet-to-be-filled pages of 2019 is simple: to wake up looking forward to the new day every day, and go to bed with gratitude.
Isn't that what life is all about? To be grateful for every day?
Forget the hustle, the big plans and all the exhausting goal-getting.
Just be.
I promise you, it's the best thing you'll ever achieve.
xoxo Miriam
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Vol. 62